Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Your tits are I can't wait for
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
