wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
