jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
