I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize
