dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Randomize