Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
