): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Randomize
