i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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