girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
