I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Randomize
