did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
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