those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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