you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Randomize
