this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Randomize
