Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
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