I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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