just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Randomize
