i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Someone came in the potted fern
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
