i wish there were pregnant emoticons
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
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