It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
