What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize