they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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