if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
True but thats because hes a fetus.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
We're not piercing ourselves today.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Randomize
