You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize