You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
