who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
