you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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