He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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