You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize