I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
