I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
