Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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