Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
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