just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
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