Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
