How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Randomize
