Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
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