4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Randomize
