He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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