Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
