what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
