Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize