well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
