Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
