butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
