why do cheetos always look like penises
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
