He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
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