tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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