she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
