Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Randomize