Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
